Pathways Courses - It Won't Happen to Me:

It Won't Happen to Me:
Substance Abuse-Related Violence Against Women for Anyone Concerned About The Issues

Module 5: Alcohol and Violence - Page 5 of 10

Role of Alcohol in the Cycle of Violence

Alcohol can affect relationships during each phase of the cycle of violence. Remember that alcohol does not cause violence, nor is it an excuse. But it can play a part in how men treat their partners.

Phase 1: The "Honeymoon Phase"

Partners may drink together on social and romantic occasions. However, alcohol is not yet the main focus. In many cases, neither person will increase drinking.

Phase 2: The "Tension-Building Phase."

Alcohol does not cause violence though it may make the violence worse.

Some men may begin to drink more heavily and more often, especially after a stressful workday. As the tension builds between the man and the woman, substance use may become a problem. Drugs and alcohol can begin to play a larger role in minor violent acts and verbal assaults.

Some women will begin to drink or use drugs to cope with the tension and abuse. Drinking helps them numb the pain, both physically and emotionally. While this "tension-building phase" happens in all abusive relationships, substance use does not always occur.⁵

Phase 3: The "Serious Battering Phase"

A man who abuses both alcohol and his partner may begin to depend more on alcohol to ease his feelings of powerlessness, guilt, and stress. His tolerance to alcohol often increases so that he needs more alcohol to achieve the same "buzz." The woman also may begin to drink or do drugs to try to prevent further abuse.

Some violent men do not abuse alcohol. However, men who drink too much and abuse their partners tend to use alcohol or drugs at the time of an incident. In one study, 75 percent of female victims reported that the man used alcohol or drugs at the time.⁶

Phase 1: The "Honeymoon Phase" Again

If the man has been abusing substances, he may try to cut back or stop using to prove that he is serious. Stopping the drinking, however, will not stop the violence. In many cases, sobriety leads to more physical and emotional abuse, as a way to relieve anxiety. The man's sense of guilt and shame increases and the woman's sense of shame and helplessness increases.⁷

In some cases, the woman tries to remain sober but her abuser forces her to drink. This may help keep her safe, but it ruins her effort to stay sober. She starts to accept the blame and believes that she is the cause of both the drinking and the violence. Depending on her level of drinking, the woman may be able to leave and seek help. If she has an alcohol problem, she faces the challenge of getting sober while keeping herself and her children safe.